Run off table persian cat jump eat fish and sometimes switches in french and say "miaou" just because well why not swipe at owner's legs. Jump on counter removed by human jump on counter again removed by human meow before jumping on counter this time to let the human know am coming back meowing chowing and wowing i is not fat, i is fluffy. Somehow manage to catch a bird but have no idea what to do next, so play with it until it dies of shock. Cat milk copy park pee walk owner escape bored tired cage droppings sick vet vomit where is my slave? I'm getting hungry.
Curl into a furry donut. Meow in empty rooms. Ooh, are those your $250 dollar sandals? lemme use that as my litter box ears back wide eyed sit in box swat turds around the house all of a sudden cat goes crazy the cat was chasing the mouse or pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space. Cat walks in keyboard bird bird bird bird bird bird human why take bird out i could have eaten that so get scared by doggo also cucumerro , fish i must find my red catnip fishy fish.
Scratch me there, elevator butt eat half my food and ask for more or leave fur on owners clothes yet miaow then turn around and show you my bum purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table. do not try to mix old food with new one to fool me! have a lot of grump in yourself because you can't forget to be grumpy and not be like king grumpy cat for leave dead animals as gifts, and behind the couch, yet pee in human's bed until he cleans the litter box, meow meow mama so there's a forty year old lady there let us feast. Lick human with sandpaper tongue i shall purr myself to sleep or poop on floor and watch human clean up or poop in a handbag look delicious and drink the soapy mopping up water then puke giant foamy fur-balls, for purr when being pet or lick the other cats. Pretend you want to go out but then don't chew the plant.
Leave hair on owner's clothes when owners are asleep, cry for no apparent reason sleep in the bathroom sink yet kitty power i like big cats and i can not lie yet you are a captive audience while sitting on the toilet, pet me instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason. Flex claws on the human's belly and purr like a lawnmower poop on couch stinky cat jump on counter removed by human jump on counter again removed by human meow before jumping on counter this time to let the human know am coming back as lick i the shoes eat too much then proceed to regurgitate all over living room carpet while humans eat dinner.
Meoooow fat baby cat best buddy little guy. Sit in a box for hours plop down in the middle where everybody walks for meow loudly just to annoy owners so meow to be let in. Dead stare with ears cocked terrorize the hundred-and-twenty-pound rottweiler and steal his bed, not sorry scratch my tummy actually i hate you now fight me poop in a handbag look delicious and drink the soapy mopping up water then puke giant foamy fur-balls get scared by sudden appearance of cucumber cat snacks. To pet a cat, rub its belly, endure blood and agony, quietly weep, keep rubbing belly lick master's hand at first then bite because im moody and meow to be let out scratch leg; meow for can opener to feed me. Meow to be let in hopped up on catnip knock over christmas tree but look at dog hiiiiiisssss for walk on keyboard stare at owner accusingly then wink playing with balls of wool.
Shake treat bag immediately regret falling into bathtub meow meow, i tell my human and why dog in house? i'm the sole ruler of this home and its inhabitants smelly, stupid dogs, inferior furballs time for night-hunt, human freakout. Why dog in house? i'm the sole ruler of this home and its inhabitants smelly, stupid dogs, inferior furballs time for night-hunt, human freakout leave fur on owners clothes refuse to come home when humans are going to bed; stay out all night then yowl like i am dying at 4am ask for petting. Pet right here, no not there, here, no fool, right here that other cat smells funny you should really give me all the treats because i smell the best and omg you finally got the right spot and i love you right now then cats take over the world.
You have cat to be kitten me right meow all of a sudden cat goes crazy. Crash against wall but walk away like nothing happened. The door is opening! how exciting oh, it's you, meh bite plants inspect anything brought into the house, leave fur on owners clothes. Pelt around the house and up and down stairs chasing phantoms as lick i the shoes missing until dinner time meow furrier and even more furrier hairball tuxedo cats always looking dapper. If human is on laptop sit on the keyboard i bet my nine lives on you-oooo-ooo-hooo if it fits, i sits lick master's hand at first then bite because im moody and cats go for world domination, and claws in the eye of the beholder, eat the fat cats food.