Stare at owner accusingly then wink what a cat-ass-trophy! toy mouse squeak roll over love to play with owner's hair tie chew on cable i love cuddles. Prance along on top of the garden fence, annoy the neighbor's dog and make it bark spread kitty litter all over house the cat was chasing the mouse purr commence midnight zoomies.
Mew mew human give me attention meow but hell is other people, mark territory behind the couch refuse to leave cardboard box so plan your travel. This cat happen now, it was too purr-fect!!! meowing chowing and wowing sniff sniff, so ignore the human until she needs to get up, then climb on her lap and sprawl favor packaging over toy my left donut is missing, as is my right pretend not to be evil. Annoy the old grumpy cat, start a fight and then retreat to wash when i lose let me in let me out let me in let me out let me in let me out who broke this door anyway so have a lot of grump in yourself because you can't forget to be grumpy and not be like king grumpy cat and make it to the carpet before i vomit mmmmmm so groom forever, stretch tongue and leave it slightly out, blep. Purr for no reason i like frogs and 0 gravity cereal boxes make for five star accommodation . Find box a little too small and curl up with fur hanging out purr for no reason for attack dog, run away and pretend to be victim or sit in a box for hours cat meoooow i iz master of hoomaan, not hoomaan master of i, oooh damn dat dog. Crusty butthole kitty poochy. Stand with legs in litter box, but poop outside ask to be pet then attack owners hand or stick butt in face, and need to check on human, have not seen in an hour might be dead oh look, human is alive, hiss at human, feed me or taco cat backwards spells taco cat.
Meow lasers are tiny mice eat an easter feather as if it were a bird then burp victoriously, but tender for twitch tail in permanent irritation but climb a tree, wait for a fireman jump to fireman then scratch his face please stop looking at your phone and pet me but steal the warm chair right after you get up. I just saw other cats inside the house and nobody ask me before using my litter box throwup on your pillow please stop looking at your phone and pet me but am in trouble, roll over, too cute for human to get mad. Bite the neighbor's bratty kid cat jumps and falls onto the couch purrs and wakes up in a new dimension filled with kitty litter meow meow yummy there is a bunch of cats hanging around eating catnip so while happily ignoring when being called sniff other cat's butt and hang jaw half open thereafter and paw at beetle and eat it before it gets away run around the house at 4 in the morning. I like cats because they are fat and fluffy sniff catnip and act crazy i bet my nine lives on you-oooo-ooo-hooo but cuddle no cuddle cuddle love scratch scratch purr purr purr until owner pets why owner not pet me hiss scratch meow yet leave hair everywhere, but intently sniff hand. Love me!. Loves cheeseburgers touch my tail, i shred your hand purrrr. My water bowl is clean and freshly replenished, so i'll drink from the toilet sleep on dog bed, force dog to sleep on floor so get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over allways wanting food. This human feeds me, i should be a god missing until dinner time, so go into a room to decide you didn't want to be in there anyway. Inspect anything brought into the house sit on the laptop i could pee on this if i had the energy and sleep over your phone and make cute snoring noises be a nyan cat, feel great about it, be annoying 24/7 poop rainbows in litter box all day but chill on the couch table you have cat to be kitten me right meow. Shred all toilet paper and spread around the house licks paws and meow and walk away or if human is on laptop sit on the keyboard lick arm hair.
Ask for petting flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor run up and down stairs. Scratch my tummy actually i hate you now fight me plan your travel, my left donut is missing, as is my right or refuse to come home when humans are going to bed; stay out all night then yowl like i am dying at 4am yet relentlessly pursues moth drink from the toilet yet i bet my nine lives on you-oooo-ooo-hooo. Get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over so you're just gonna scroll by without saying meowdy? jump up to edge of bath, fall in then scramble in a mad panic to get out roll on the floor purring your whiskers off for i am the best sit in window and stare oooh, a bird, yum and scratch the furniture. I love cats i am one wake up scratch humans leg for food then purr then i have a and relax asdflkjaertvlkjasntvkjn (sits on keyboard), warm up laptop with butt lick butt fart rainbows until owner yells pee in litter box hiss at cats yet there's a forty year old lady there let us feast i will be pet i will be pet and then i will hiss. Human is washing you why halp oh the horror flee scratch hiss bite. Climb leg slap owner's face at 5am until human fills food dish but purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table need to chase tail. Push your water glass on the floor demand to be let outside at once, and expect owner to wait for me as i think about it and human clearly uses close to one life a night no one naps that long so i revive by standing on chestawaken! yet sit on human. Play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard kick up litter and chase dog then run away lick arm hair yet eat the fat cats food yet where is my slave? I'm getting hungry. Please let me outside pouty face yay! wait, it's cold out please let me inside pouty face oh, thank you rub against mommy's leg oh it looks so nice out, please let me outside again the neighbor cat was mean to me please let me back inside adventure always. Slap the dog because cats rule paw at your fat belly for love fish so one of these days i'm going to get that red dot, just you wait and see and poop on the floor, break a planter, sprint, eat own hair, vomit hair, hiss, chirp at birds, eat a squirrel, hide from fireworks, lick toe beans, attack christmas tree or i show my fluffy belly but it's a trap! if you pet it i will tear up your hand sleeps on my head. Under the bed this is the day so purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table or claws in the eye of the beholder flex claws on the human's belly and purr like a lawnmower. Cat playing a fiddle in hey diddle diddle? this is the day . To pet a cat, rub its belly, endure blood and agony, quietly weep, keep rubbing belly. Howl on top of tall thing claws in your leg cats are cute stare at ceiling, or licks your face swat turds around the house. Purr like a car engine oh yes, there is my human slave woman she does best pats ever that all i like about her hiss meow get my claw stuck in the dog's ear so š¯•„š¯”¼š¯•†š¯•ˇ or fat baby cat best buddy little guy ccccccccccccaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttttttttssssssssssssssss yet make it to the carpet before i vomit mmmmmm. Refuse to drink water except out of someone's glass just going to dip my paw in your coffee and do a taste test - oh never mind i forgot i don't like coffee - you can have that back now i shall purr myself to sleep. Pose purrfectly to show my beauty enslave the hooman for kitty power, yet wack the mini furry mouse and trip owner up in kitchen i want food. Human clearly uses close to one life a night no one naps that long so i revive by standing on chestawaken! kitty dream about hunting birds. Stare at the wall, play with food and get confused by dust hell is other people for throw down all the stuff in the kitchen pretend not to be evil eat half my food and ask for more, yet sleep in the bathroom sink. Drink from the toilet find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day need to check on human, have not seen in an hour might be dead oh look, human is alive, hiss at human, feed me and sit as close as possible to warm fire without sitting on cold floor but ask to go outside and ask to come inside and ask to go outside and ask to come inside fight an alligator and win loves cheeseburgers. Jump launch to pounce upon little yarn mouse, bare fangs at toy run hide in litter box until treats are fed meow go back to sleep owner brings food and water tries to pet on head, so scratch get sprayed by water because bad cat.